Greetings dear readers!  I’ve been terrrrrrible about updating, and all that’s going to change… soon. 

So what’s new with Colin?  Well, first of all he’s in Portland Maine now.  It’s rained every day since I’ve arrived, I think.  The weather is nice otherwise.  There’s only been one uncomfortably hot day, and it was down in the low 50s by sundown. 

Other news – there is no film industry here.  Thanks to Maine, there is a terrible film incentive, so all the work goes to every state but this one.  Great.  Allie and I are going to try to focus on photography instead.  I’d like to do a show, and we both want to try our hands and some strange experimental developing techniques.  Could be fun, could be a disaster.  Good thing film is relatively cheap!  Eventually I’ll find a movie or some sort of project.  Maybe an animation?  I should learn that myself so I can just do it.  Ugh.  I’m a terrible drawer though.

And last of all, if you have not heard…

I am engaged!!!!

Yes that’s right – the beautiful, fun, talented Allie said yes to me on a wet rock next to High Falls.  Wedding plans are in the works, but other than that, we’re just happy to be together in a few place :)

That’s all for now!  I’m just chilling like a Colin and getting settled into a drastically new life.

At any rate, it’s been a while since I have reviewed anything.  I know I’m supposed to be writing full reviews, but these shorties should be okay for now, right? I’m a little ashamed, because if this guy can do movie reviews:

then I really have no excuses, now do I?

On to reviews – first the ones that have played in theaters, then I will follow up with Atlanta Film Festival movies.

Coraline, A- What a great movie.  The opening was brilliant/creepy as anything.  Wonderful animation and very worth the watch.  Might be a little scary for kids, but good for all ages.

Friday the 13th, F Walked out.  It was just stupid.  It has nothing to do with Friday the 13th, it was just a way to slap the brand on a movie, kills some kids in the woods, and make (if I recall correctly) rediculous profits.

Madea Goes to Jail, D- Another terrible movie.  Walked out, got dirty looks for doing so. I guess I could maybe understand the appeal, but it’s like trying to enjoy a high school play – bad acting, bad filming, okay plot..pity perhaps?

Watchmen, B- I’ve never read the comic, so I don’t know how it compared.  Some parts were cool, othes were a bit comicy.  It was entertaining overall, but I don’t know if I’d watch it again.

Knowing, D++ That extra plus is for Nick Cage.  A pointless movie with typical NC acting. I guess if you’re on the mindless quest that Allie and I are on (to see all of his movies) you should see it.  Otherwise, probably not.  Wait for the Rifftrax on it.

The Haunting in Connecticut, D I wanted this to be so much better than it was.  Typical horror movie, but a worthless ending.  I guess if it’s based on true events…

Fast and Furious (4), B+ I don’t care what anybody says, this was easily the best movie of the series.  Better cars, better action.  No comparison, plus it was just fun to watch even if you hadn’t seen the rest.

Dragonball Evolution, D+ This is exactly what happens when you try to translate anime directly to live action with little tweaking in between.  Wow, it was rough. 

Crank: High Voltage, B In the tradition of the last Crank movie, it was nonstop rediculous action.  I truly admire these film makers – they work quickly, low budget, and have a great story telling method.  Not for everybody – you’ll probably feel like you need a shower and a good cry after its done.

Earth, C This was another one I really wanted to be better.  Typical global warming, environmental, etc, but it had some really beautiful shots.  Planet Earth will still be my first blueray purchase.

Fighting, F Terrence Howard probably has the most annoying speaking voice I’ve ever heard.  Walked out about halfway through.

X-Men Origins: Wolvering, C- I’ve just realized that this year is the most disappointing for movies I’ve ever seen.  So disappointing.  Guess how I felt about Wolverine?

Star Trek, B+ While a good watch and I’m sure great for fans, just didn’t do as much for me.  Plus it was a Star Wars story ripoff – you all know it, don’t pretend Star Trek is original!

Terminator Salvation, A- I watched all of the previous movies up to this one.  It was really a good movie in the sequence, especially after Rise of the Blah blah blah…  The only thing I didn’ t like was super-plastic Arnold.  It was somewhere between disgusting and insulting to watch.

UP, B Get mad.  I didn’t like it as much as previous Pixar.  Still a very good movie, but felt kind of kidsy – cheap jokes, nothing too sophisticated.  Still better than Cars. 

The Land of the Lost, B It was like one long, weird skit.  More adult than I expected, but had some really funny moments.

The Hangover, C- I’m ashamed I watched this.  I almost walked out, probably should have.  I’m done with these kinds of comedies – nothing is funny, they’re just trying to be shocking or gross.

Now, Atlanta Film Festival 2009.  It was a good festival, lots of good movies playing, including two shorts I had worked on.  Hopefully I’ll be back some day, probably with a new film.

Rudo y Cursi, A+ Great movie – hilarious, dark, dramatic, but didn’t drag for a moment.  I don’t care if you don’t like subtitles, you’d better be watching this movie when it comes out.  It’s in limited release at the moment, should be on DVD shortly.

500 Days of Summer, C It was a hollywood movies that happened to be indie.  It was okay, but the ending just ruined the film for me.  It did not belong.  I have to wonder if it was tacked on later by Fox in an attempt to make it more mainstream.  Question for the director, I suppose…

Deadland, F Like many movies, great poster, terrible followthrough.  A plot and some set dressing could have helped.  Not sure why it was accepted.

The Death of Alice Blue, F This one wasn’t as suprising as Deadland, but I just didn’t like it.  It was really trying too hard. 

That Evening Sun, A+ This is a must-see for anybody, and is now one of my favorite movies.  A beautiful script, shot so well.  It didn’t throw anything in your face and was a great example of what souther movies should be.  Rent it, buy it – either way you need to see it.

Sqeezebox, C+ Documentaries – not my favorite in any case.  I had never heard of Squeezebox, so it was very informative, just not that entertaining.

We Fun, C+ Another one.  Documentary.  I don’t know, I didn’t really like many of the bands and Mastadon was on for about 2 minutes.  The short before it about Peter Stubbs – brilliant.

That’s all for the reviews.  Stay tuned for more posts and an update to the site!

News Flash!  REX, The Bridge, and Magellan are all in festival contention and all movies I have worked on.  No word yet on the last two, but REX has played a few festivals so far.  I’m hopeful all three will play Atlanta Film Festival this year!  The result of this:  Colin needs to update his webpage again and revert back to something a teensy bit more professional. 

More Nudes!  I mean News!  I’ll be having a photography “show” of sorts – photos on permanent display at a coffee house, with a nice little opening night (fingers crossed).  This will be in April, dates to come!

Changes!  I will be altering the look of the site just a little bit, especially to reflect the soon to be LLC status of Visceral Cognition (yay taxes, misery, death).  This will include a photography section that will feature prints for sale from my upcoming show (ask about discounts for family, friends, people I like) as well as more pruned down galleries of some of my favorite/best shots instead of the dumping ground I use Flickr for.  Sidetrack:  when I explore or go places and photograph, part of just documenting, the other is finding good shots.  I put all of that up on Flickr just for me.  I need to prune out the random stuff and just get down to some serious arts that have been color corrected and balanced.  Those will be on the site.  Okay, i’m back.

Another change will be adding more about audio – I am working on my reel, although my DEAD hard drive killed a few good projects that need to be on there.  I can get them, it’s just a pain at this point.  I also am working on some beginner production audio guides – what mics to use when, sound differences, placement, etc.  Allie will be assisting and those should be live sometime in March.  Maybe after that I can tackle some audio editing tutorials, but I doubt it.  Don’t want to give away secrets.  Also with the LLC status, I can rent equipment with more ease/peace of mind now.  I’ll be including rental packages and expanding inventory later this year.  I’ll also be including labor prices for editing and production sound.

Last of all… Allie is still my girlfriend!  She’s stuck around and seems to like me or something :)  I’m going to start teaching her the production audio trade, although she already knows most of it.  This will help me help you – I can’t be out on set all the time, but Allie is much more flexible and just as good as having me.  I can also work on post audio with relative ease knowing the production sound is good. 

That’s all for now!

Final Movie Count:  45, down 15 from last year.

As you can see, a good number of C and D range movies, I think more than last year.  A suprising 8 A-grade movies this year!  Not bad. 

Colin’s Top 5 of ‘08

1. Slumdog Millionaire
2. Wall-E
3. Burn After Reading
4. Son of Rambow
5. Milk

Didn’t quite make the list:  Pineapple Express, Speed Racer, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Skills Like This.  Skills Like This is technically a 2009 release now, so I’m not sure if I should count it in the top 5 for ‘09 instead.  It would be 2 or 3 for ‘08 otherwise. 

Colin’s Bottom 5 of ‘08

1. The Spirit
2. The Love Guru
3. Max Payne
4. One Missed Call
5. X-Files:  I Want to Believe

Didn’t quite make the list:  Transsiberian and 10,000 BC.  The Love Guru would be number 1 if I had watched the entire movie, but the 20 minutes I saw were enough to make it the number 2 movie. 

Goal for 2009 is 80 movies in theaters, as well as at least 20 actual full reviews like I did for “Part of the Problem.”  Those were fun, but difficult at times.  Only having to review 1/4 of the movies gives me a chance to be a little pickier and let inspiration hit me.

Well here we are in the new year.  A month into the new year.  I’m on a strong pace to make 12 blog posts this year. 

I’m here to talk about movies – finishing up the last few of 2008, and telling you about the new muck I’ve seen so far in 2009.  Next post will be a roundup of my top and bottom 5 of 2008. 

The Day the Earth Stood Still, D  I am constantly defending Keaknew Reeves as a decent actor, but it’s stuff like this that just undermines me.  Such a nothing movie – nothing happens, it has no point, it drags and is so incredibly painful.  There were some cool destruction montages at the end – the only thing that saved this from an F.  Filthy, misleading trailer.

The Spirit, F-  Ah the dreaded F-.  It looked kinda cool, but that was it.  Just blah blah blah, stupid fights, blah blah blah.  I fell asleep, woke up, and I was still hearing the same stuff over and over.  What a waste of time!  Frank Miller, you hack!

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, B+  This movie is long.  Really long.  You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly long it is.  Still a good film, but that’s the reason for a less than A grade.  The movie is exactly what you think it is – he starts old, gets young.  The only thing I wish there was more of (more length!) would be some parts of his younger (older?) years.  There was a lot of him leaving home and making his way, but it rushed through the rest.  Also, Josh Hartnett should have played young Brad Pitt.

Milk, A+  A great biopic about Harvey Milk, the first gay elected official in California, and his rise to power.  It was a very real look at gay life and, I felt, one of the most accurate portrayals of gays in cinema.  Usually you have a stereotypical flamboyant gay side character there for comic relief or for some version of diversity.  Nice to see a good film being made.  I really think it’s still too gay for Hollywood although it got more Oscar nominations than I thought it would. 

Slumdog Millionaire, A+  Ending the year off on a huge high note with Milk and Slumdog.  Indie filmmaker Danny Boyle brings it was in intricate tale of a slum kid from India on his way to winning “Who Wants to Be A Millionaire.”  Everything about the film flowed so perfectly – story, music, editing.  No wonder it’s the frontrunner for Best Picture and just about every other award.

That’s all from 2008.  On to 2009!

The Unborn, C  It’s Beth!  From Cloverfield!  She’s about as annoying in this role as she is screaming and crying about having rebar rammed through her chest.  Whiner!  This was a typical horror montage with very little explanation or logical world rules.  Provided lots of opportunity for hilarious commentary.

My Bloody Valentine 3D, B-  The plot wasn’t that great, and neither was the cinematography, but the action was so over the top bloody and hilarious, I had to give this one a good grade.  One of the most enjoyable stupid movies since Crank.  Speaking of – CRANK 2 IS COMING!!!  More excuses for Jason Statham to be shirtless…

Here we are in January.  Arguably the most entertaining month for movies, but also the time when we get to seethe over the stupid choices made on awards shows. 

This year’s Sheeple’s Choice Awards was about the same as every year - like a bad myspace poll. 

Which was your favorite independent film this year???

• The Secret Life of Bees
• The Duchess
• Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day

Um.  Are those really my only choices?   Click HERE for the full list of “winners.”

Last night we go the Golden Globes, which made the right choice by showering Danny Boyle with awards for Slumdog Millionaire including Best Director and Best Picture.  Click HERE for the list of winners, although I usually skip the TV portion. 

Soon the Oscars.  Ahh that ignorant voting group.

Rose Hill is well laid out, in theory.  Reality is nice stepped terraces tend to deteriorate over the years and stuff slides down the hill and into obscurity.  It’s also huge – 65 acres according to the website.  Nearly impossible to police that kind of land, it’s in sad disrepair with a lot of vandalism.  Thankfully there is a foundation that is trying to raise money to keep the place secure (see the official cemetery site). 

If you’ve got some time on your hands, here is a nice rundown of a lot of the historic people buried in the cemetery. 

And some pictures:

Allie stuck inside a stone bird cage.

Here is the rest of the flickr set:  CLICK!

I take it back, Al Gore was right.  Totally right. 

Not really, this is just typical Georgia, but I thought this was nice:

I arrived at work to find the air conditioning had been turned back on.

Okay, I’ve been sitting on these for a while.  Should be in somewhat chronological order, but don’t hold me to anything. 

Hellboy II , C+  The somewhat-awaited sequel to 2004’s Hellboyfinally dropped in ‘08.  It wasn’t quite as fun as the first one, but still entertained.  The Tooth Fairies were particularly disturbing.  I always like Guillermo del Toro’s visual style, but not always his directing.  Fun flick, watch it when the DVD arrives.

The Dark Knight, B-  I know I’ll get grief for this, but it wasn’t all it was hyped to be.  Heath Ledger was good as the Joker, but I don’t think it would warrant an Oscar nomination.  This time around Gotham City is a nice Chicago-esque city, far from the gritty Gotham of Batman Begins.  It made a vigilante in a bat suitseem far more stupid/insane given the setting.  Speaking of stupid/insane – the Joker’s ridiculously elaborate plots really didn’t do much for the storyline either.  I’m not saying I hated the film, I just want to make sure I point out that this is not the best movie of all time, or even the best Batman of the series. 

Transsiberian, C-  I’m always up for a good limited release film, especially when it involves Russia.  Mmm, do I love the strangeness that is Russia.  Transsiberian was a beautifully shot film, great locations, but really fell short in every other way.  It wasn’t the worst thing ever, but it felt about 3 times longer than it actually was.

X-Files:  I Want to Believe, D  X-Files was a great show.  Even the last horrible season had some cool elements.  I’m not sure what happened between that last show and this movie.  Obviously the ability to write a good, scary story was lost.  I know we’ve been waiting and waiting (SPOILERS!) for them to get together, but c’mon.  Weak.  Painful. Do another, and get this franchise back on track. 

Pineapple Express, A-  I was a little nervous going into this movie since I thought it had one of the best trailers I’ve seen in years.  It did not disappoint.  Very very funny, very very violent.  One of the best brawl scenes in a movie since The Quiet Man.  Probably not for everybody, but one of the best stoner/action movies I’ve seen.

Death Race, B  I could probably copy&paste this review down to Transporter 3 – lots of shirtless Jason Statham, lots of ridiculous action, but a load of fun.  I can’t get enough of these types of senseless action movies. 

Babylon A.D., D+  I like Vin Diesel.  I’ll pretty much see anything he’s in.  I even liked the trailer for this movie.  That’s about it.  Painfully boring, very little action, and one of the dumbest endings of a movie I have ever seen (”oh no, they destroyed our two Range Rovers!  you win, VD!”)

Bangkok Dangerous, D  Ah Nick Cage – your emotionless acting and befuddled looks lure me in every time.  You’ve even grown out those luxurious curls!  I can’t even remember what this movie was about.  I do remember being surprised that the “Drink when he says ‘uh’” game did not go that well.  Why do I fall for his charms every time?

Burn After Reading, A  Just like I did not understand the hype for Dark Knight, I did not understand the dislike for Burn After Reading.  As far as madcap and unexpectedly violent movies go, I can’t think of a better film.  I’m not sure what people expect from the Coens.  They make good movies, but they range from drama to comedy and every place in between.  Can’t please everyone, but this movie pleased me. 

Miracle at St. Anna, C  The trailers were very shrouded in mystery and really spurred me on to get to the theaters for the opening weekend.  Bad acting, a non-punchline, and a really silly ending just ruined what could have been a great film.  Oh well. 

Nick and Norah’s Infinite Play List, B+  Finally an indie film that doesn’t pretend it’s not luring in its fanbase with a catchy indie soundtrack.  Call it what it is.  A little less cute and a little more adult made this a much more enjoyable film than I thought it would be. 

XXY, C+  I missed this one at the AFF this year, but got it in theaters a few months later.  Soooo sloooow.  One redeeming scene, which you’ll instantly recognize if you bother renting.  Don’t bother. 

City of Ember, D+  I love alternate world movies.  Experiencing a new world is one of the best things about going to the theater and sitting in the dark for 2 hours.  However, this is Walden, and no matter how good the story, it’s going to be bad.  I never learn. 

Max Payne, D  He must find the supernatural killer!  Not only was the trailer misleading and deviated from the game, it didn’t even accurately reflect what was going on in the movie.  Max Payne was supposed to be about straight up psycho violence, not brooding and reflecting.  What a waste of a good game movie.  Hopefully they can Hulk this one and make a good sequel.

Quantum of Solace, C+  The last Bond had some of the best action sequences imaginable.  Well done!  Bravo!  The new bond shot some random footage, spliced it all together, and had the gall to send it out the doors as a movie.  I get shaky/quick-cut action, but this was way too much.  I had no idea what was going.  The entire plot was pretty weak as well…. OOooo!  Big bad guy is getting water contracts in third world countries!  That’s so crazy!  I’m not even going to comment on how the trailer lied about the cool 60s looking style it should have been shot in.

Twilight, C-  Vampires are already a bit brooding and moody, but when you drop that into a perpetual 17 year old, it crosses into territory I’d rather not see.  Those books had better be amazing, because I don’t see the appeal of this movie.  Aparently Kristin Stewart is as unbearable in real life as she is in the movie.  Way to reach for the starts with that indie stripper role, Kristin!

Transporter 3, B  The last Transporter wasn’t that great, and very little can match the first one, but this was pretty good.  Statham shirtless half the time, etc.  Kicking, punching, etc.  Completely implausible car sequences.  Good times.

That brings me up to date on the year’s movies!  I still want to see Punisher (despite the numerous bad reviews), Milk, Boy in the Striped Pajamas, and The Day the Earth Stood Still (blank stare for me, Keanu!).  That should bring me up to about 40 movies for the year.. about half of what I had hoped for.  I just can’t handle the bad movies like I used to.  Allie should help with getting to that elusive goal next year!

I just upgraded WordPress.  I thought it would fix some of the funky looking posts below, but it doesn’t look like it has.  That’s odd. 

At least spell checking and some other features work well now. 

I will be doing a movie roundup in the next day or so – keep lookin!  I also hope to be updating the website to make it more professional and LLCish, as well as adding more urban exploration posts/pictures to the blog.  Dsankt has inspired me by his excellent blog at http://sleepycity.net/

See ya, blog readers!